Hi Betsy, re: teens- I don’t know yet, but I’ve seen how my kids wade me into each new thing. Like, thank god, they’re not born teens- you’ll already have known them their whole lives! Kids ease you into each phase like a shifting tide.
I loved my first pregnancy because it was so SCIENCE, a self-contained magical science experiment growing within me. And it was really amazing to experience that, and the actual physical connectivity with baby. I know many women have had losses and difficult pregnancies, but there is a lot of magic to be had as well.
My overall thought about having kid(s)- doing it and not doing it are of equal value, but If you want to do it, don’t let fear of the thing be your guide post.
If you’re afraid of loss of self or quality of life, but you want to be a parent, consider “one.” It’s so much more common now, and life felt very
balanced with one. Good luck!